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Carey
AALBC .com Platinum Poster
Username: Carey

Post Number: 1769
Registered: 05-2004

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Posted on Saturday, March 14, 2009 - 08:50 pm:   Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Carey.

Just a quick reminder. Your poem (VOYEUR?) which you submitted to the OZ POETIC SOCIETY'S in consideration as a Weekly Poem will be posted as of Sunday, 15th March, 2009.

Thank you for your contribution and congratulations on your achievement.




Regards,

Anthony S.
OZ POETIC SOCIETY
http://www.ozpoeticsociety.com/


Look out Cagedbird, I am right behind you. You are a seasoned pro and I am a puppy but don't count that other contest as yours. I am waiting too. I got that same notice.

Thanks for all your help.

Carey

Carey
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Cagedbird
Regular Poster
Username: Cagedbird

Post Number: 85
Registered: 02-2004

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Posted on Sunday, March 15, 2009 - 08:28 am:   Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

CONGRATS! Ok, Grasshopper, the contest I sent ya in your box, ends 2day, I say we both will WIN!!

Your mail keeps coming back 2 me is this correct:
carey.m@michsi.com??????????????????

Soon, you will be saying, "ME" "ME" "ME" lol!!!

*****************************************

Sarcasm: Teaching people not to ask stupid questions for centuries!

Yesterday I was buying a 2 large bags of Purina dog chow at Wal-Mart, for my dogs Winston, Chief, Gus, and Maximus. I was about to check out when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think, that I had an elephant? Since I had little else to do, on impulse, I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, and that I was starting the Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I ended up in the hospital last time. On the bright side though, I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in the Intensive Care Ward with tubes coming out of every orifice in my body and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry and that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was enthralled with my story by now.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food had poisoned me. I told her no; I had stopped in the middle of the parking lot to lick my butt and a car hit me.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack, he was laughing so hard!
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Carey
AALBC .com Platinum Poster
Username: Carey

Post Number: 1770
Registered: 05-2004

Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!)

Posted on Sunday, March 15, 2009 - 10:17 am:   Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Well ol'wise one, Ya gotta let micheal go. I know he made your heart flip but my address is Carey.m@mchsi.com ....not "mich". What do you do, write these down on hotel matchbooks? *lol*
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Chrishayden
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Chrishayden

Post Number: 7822
Registered: 03-2004

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Posted on Monday, March 16, 2009 - 11:04 am:   Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Sarcasm: Teaching people not to ask stupid questions for centuries!

Yesterday I was buying a 2 large bags of Purina dog chow at Wal-Mart, for my dogs Winston, Chief, Gus, and Maximus.

(This was a good one. I am going to use it, with modifications.

I might not tell anybody I was trying to lick my butt....)
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Cagedbird
Regular Poster
Username: Cagedbird

Post Number: 86
Registered: 02-2004

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Posted on Monday, March 16, 2009 - 11:13 am:   Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Funny, Chris. Have a nice week!
These come in my box all the time. Just sharing, peace! I enjoy being with the guys here @ The Poetree:-)

***********************************************



Old Timer Sex

This is too funny to be dirty - enjoy!

The husband leans over and asks his wife, 'Do you remember the first time we had sex together over fifty years ago? We went behind the village tavern where you leaned against the back fence and I made love to you.'

'Yes', she says, 'I remember it well.'

'OK,' he says, 'How about taking a stroll around there again and we can do it for old time's sake?'

'Oh Jim, you old devil, that sounds like a crazy, but good idea!'

A police officer sitting in the next booth heard their conversation and, having a chuckle to himself, he thinks to himself, I've got to see these two old-timers having sex against a fence. I'll just keep an eye on them so there's no trouble. So he follows them.

The elderly couple walks haltingly along, leaning on each other for support aided by walking sticks. Finally, they get to the back of the tavern and make their way to the fence. The old lady lifts her skirt and the old man drops his trousers. As she leans against the fence, the old man moves in.. Then suddenly they erupt into the most furious sex that the policeman has ever seen. This goes on for about ten minutes while both are making loud noises and moaning and screaming. Finally, they both collapse, panting on the ground.

The policeman is amazed. He thinks he has learned something about life and old age that he didn't know.

After about half an hour of lying on the ground recovering, the old couple struggle to their feet and put their clothes back on. The policeman, is still watching and thinks to himself, this is truly amazing, I've got to ask them what their secret is.

So, as the couple passes, he says to them, 'Excuse me, but that was something else. You must've had a fantastic sex life together. Is there some sort of secret to this?'

Shaking, the old man is barely able to reply, 'Fifty years ago that wasn't an electric fence.'

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