| Author | Message | ||
     Carey AALBC .com Platinum Poster Username: Carey Post Number: 2004 Registered: 05-2004 Rating: N/A |
Samson & Delilah, Bill Clinton & Monica, Steve McNair & The Woman ...Love-Lust-Marriage-Consequences. I've heard it said that Samson was an individualistic rabble-rouser seeking to satisfy his appetites. Bill Clinton said he didn't have sex with that woman. Many are saying Steve McNair was a good football player and a good man. James Brown said it's a man's world. I am sure we've all heard the phrase, you reap what you sow. The other day I was reading a journalistic commentary on the courts decision of the complaint brought before them by white firefighters. The journalist opened his essay in somewhat of an apologetic nature. It was almost as if he was asking forgiveness for telling the truth. Well, today I feel like that journalist because I have some things I want to say that many may not want to hear. I am sure there are women of power that have been tempted by men and consequently, found themselves on the outside looking in. Off the top of my head I can't think of one. Steve McNair, a former NFL MVP and father of four was found dead laying next to the dead body of a woman. They were the victims of gunshot wounds. It's been reported they were in a relationship. Relationships come in various flavors. I have a relationship with my daughter and my sons. The relationship between my employers and I has at times caused me grief. I don't know the exact nature of the relationship between Steve McNair and the woman found with him but it appears their relationship cost him his life. My significant other didn't show sorrow for him when she said, "that's what he gets for playing with a young girls heart". I wasn't so quick to pull that trigger. Maybe it's the man in me protecting the "rights" of another man but I asked her how do we know he was playing with her heart? I even got a little indignant and told her she knew nothing about his intentions, She said he was married with four children. I fell deeper into my protection of a man I didn't even know. I asked her if it's possible for a man to have a female friend and that friendship be of mutual consent, thus, getting what they both agreed on. Is it possible that not all relationships are of a usury nature? She admitted that was possible, yet in this case - not likely. Days before the fatal incident, Steve McNair and his companion were stopped for a driving violation. They were riding in a car they co-owned. She was the driver and was given a DUI citation (driving under the influence) . Mr McNair was seen taking a taxi from the scene. The more I carried the heavy flag of equal rights for all men and the protection of their world, the more I sunk into the quicksand of nonsense. I had no solid foundation in which to place my argument. If I desired to turn a blind eye to the seemingly obvious, I could remain in self imposed delusion. In the world of addictions it's agreed by most professionals that the recovering substance abuser relapses into their old habit long before they take their drug of choice. It's a given their behaviors prior to that consumption will send them back down a road to their eventual death. In the movie The Color Purple, Mister told Celie's father that he gotta have somebody right now. Celie's father replied ..."I can't let you have Nettie, she too young but I can let you have Celie, she ain't fresh tho, she spoiled - twice. Steve McNair has 4 children. Somewhere in my heart I didn't want to believe that Steve McNair needed something new - something fresh. Again I heard the voice of my girlfriend turned new morning opponent. She said he has probably been doing "it" all his adult life. She even hit me with the old "where there's smoke there's fire". She continued to pound me. She asked why McNair would be any different than Kobe Bryant, Magic Johnson, Wilt Chamberlin, and the rest of the NBA penis slingers. I don't like losing debates but I was losing ground. So I reached in my pocket and pulled out a low blow - I reached for the bible. I told her that Eve was the first to bite from the forbidden fruit. She was seduced by the serpent and then tempted Adam. Can I lay my argument on that foundation? Would it be the truth to say that Steve McNair is the victim? The truth is there are now consequences and burdens laid upon the lap of Steve McNair's wife and children. The children are now faced with the task of going through life without a father and his wife is left with so many questions. Who's at fault and what's the Truth? I am sure many have opinions. | ||
| Yvettep AALBC .com Platinum Poster Username: Yvettep Post Number: 3572 Registered: 01-2005 Rating: N/A |
From what I read, this "woman" was 20 years old. Most 20 year olds think they are grown, but those of us who haven't seen 20 in a minute know what a fantasy that is. In general--it is simply not wise for a grown man (or woman) to think they have an adult "arrangement" or "understanding" with someone who, likely, is so clearly not their emotional equal. As to this specific case, however, I try not to blame victims of crimes--especially so soon after their passing. So I'll reserve judgment on this tragic situation for now. | ||
| Cynique "Cyniquian" Level Poster Username: Cynique Post Number: 13874 Registered: 01-2004 Rating: N/A |
Once again, we have a married man in the public eye succumbing to the thrill of risk-taking, unable to resist the taboo of exploring a different passage to passion. "Forbidden fruit tastes sweetest" but the consequences can be bitter. Testosterone is like a drug which mimics an adrenalin rush and when it is released, the brain defers to the penis. Your assessment about liaisans between adults and 20-year-olds is right on target, Yvette!  | ||
| Carey AALBC .com Platinum Poster Username: Carey Post Number: 2005 Registered: 05-2004 Rating: N/A |
Cynique, you stopped me at the door. I was going to ask if it would be different if it's found out that he was separated from his wife. You and Yvettep said something my lady championed as well. She said a contract between a young woman and a grown ass married man is void from the jump. I don't know if you've heard it, but R. Kelly has been at it again.Police have been at his door looking for a 17 yr old girl. His response to a question about his taste for young girl was "how young"? Even though a woman is of legal age, I've always wondered if a man in their thirties or forties is a even match for young girls 20 and below. | ||
| Ferociouskitty Veteran Poster Username: Ferociouskitty Post Number: 771 Registered: 02-2008 Rating: N/A |
Apparently, the cops are saying the R. Kelly story is just a rumor. Sigh...Not really looking forward to commentary on the McNair story from the "old enough to bleed" crowd. | ||
| Carey AALBC .com Platinum Poster Username: Carey Post Number: 2007 Registered: 05-2004 Rating: N/A |
Lol @ ferociouskitty, I did open that door didn't I. Wow, how stupid of me. I don't ever want to do another Morgan Freeman rerun. I am requesting everyone stike everything I've said about R. Kelly and Mr. Freeman from their minds. I guess I have to say Mr. McNair as well. | ||
| Abm "Cyniquian" Level Poster Username: Abm Post Number: 10388 Registered: 04-2004 Rating: |
The vast MAJORITY of +35 year old men who bone post-pubescent chicks are NOT killed by them. Moreover, statistically speaking, Steve was more likely to be killed by his wife than his 20-year old sidepv$$y seeing as the women who are most likely to kill men are their WIVES. So the only real 'cautionary tale' here is that Pv$$y is dangerous. And it can even kill you. But then, hell, if a man ain't getting any the way he wants and needs it, he probably wants to kill himself anyway. *shrugs* | ||
| Cynique "Cyniquian" Level Poster Username: Cynique Post Number: 13876 Registered: 01-2004 Rating: N/A |
It's not pussy that's dangerous. A man's inability to resist "sidepv$$y" is what is dangerous. That's the message this cautionary tales sends. All married men lust in their hearts; only those who lack will power act on the urge to stray. | ||
| Carey AALBC .com Platinum Poster Username: Carey Post Number: 2008 Registered: 05-2004 Rating: N/A |
Whoa! Cynique has spoken and she didn't even cross out the word p**sy *lol*. That ABM ....P**sy kills *lol*. Well, I guess it can be kind of dangerous. I am just glad I wrote that post and somebody else wasn't writing about me. I had a gun pulled on me - and yes, it was about a piece of P**sy. I guess pomtang can kill ....ABM is right! *smirk* | ||
| Abm "Cyniquian" Level Poster Username: Abm Post Number: 10389 Registered: 04-2004 Rating: N/A |
Carey, Think of all the trouble you ever got into your life ever since you became a grown man. I wager a HIGH percentage of such had a vajayjay somehow attached to it. | ||
| Carey AALBC .com Platinum Poster Username: Carey Post Number: 2013 Registered: 05-2004 Rating: N/A |
Well Abm, you are a very smart man but that bet you would have lost. Since I became a grown man, none of my problems had anything to do with women. Really, I made enough mistakes as a kid/young man (16 - 23) to last me for a life time. I am not saying that I didn't make huge mistakes in other areas of my life, but chasing tale stopped. | ||
| Yvettep AALBC .com Platinum Poster Username: Yvettep Post Number: 3577 Registered: 01-2005 Rating: N/A |
More and more that is coming out about this case makes it even more unbelievable and sad all around. For instance the question of how old the woman was when they met and began their relationship. (She was 20 at death and they had been going out for a while at least...we can all do the math.) Also whether or not the condominium and/or car were given/loaned to her by McNair, and what this arrangement may have meant in her mind about where their relationship was headed. It is true that most situations like this do not end in anyone's death. But how many of them end up in happiness and good times long term? | ||
| Cynique "Cyniquian" Level Poster Username: Cynique Post Number: 13879 Registered: 01-2004 Rating: N/A |
P***y is like a gun which is only as dangerous as the person whose hand it is in. Similarly, it's not money that is the root of all evil; it's the love of money which is the root of all evil. And then there's this discussion; it would be interesting, - if it wasn't so insignificent...  | ||
| Yvettep AALBC .com Platinum Poster Username: Yvettep Post Number: 3578 Registered: 01-2005 Rating: N/A |
LOL @Cynique! I had to read your first sentence, like, 4 times!!! | ||
| Abm "Cyniquian" Level Poster Username: Abm Post Number: 10390 Registered: 04-2004 Rating: N/A |
Carey, Good for you, bruh. Yvettep, McNair probably shouldn't have been screwing that girl (not the least of reasons being his already having a wife). But, hell, she was legal. So don't be making out like he was a dayam pedophile. | ||
| Carey AALBC .com Platinum Poster Username: Carey Post Number: 2014 Registered: 05-2004 Rating: N/A |
Utt oOOOh. | ||
| Yvettep AALBC .com Platinum Poster Username: Yvettep Post Number: 3579 Registered: 01-2005 Rating: N/A |
Who, besides you, said anything about pedophilia? Let's assume he knew her for a year. That means he was a grown man starting a relationship with a 19 year old. "Legality" is not the point. Whether or not his actions were wise and prudent--beyond the simple infidelity--is. I'll say it again: Few 20 (or 19) year olds are going to be able to have a mature relationship with a 30-something partner. Even then, most of these situations do not end in anyone's murder/suicide. But he definitely had advantages in terms of age, life experience, wealth and fame that made the pairing unequal. Just because someone can or is legally allowed to do something does not mean that they should do it. Having some level of restraint and ability to look ahead and think reflectively about consequences is one of the many markers of maturity. By no means am I singling McNair out (**cough**Bill Clinton/Marion Barry/Gov Sanford**cough). Plenty of grown folks--men and women--choose not to take advantage of this gift of growing older. | ||
| Carey AALBC .com Platinum Poster Username: Carey Post Number: 2015 Registered: 05-2004 Rating: N/A |
I think we all know where most of us stand on this issue, so I think I'll just asks a few questions. The woman in my post implied that's something wrong with a man like McNair being with a girl that young. I didn't necessarily walk with her but I sort of know what's she's talking about. Abm, I don't know how old your daughters are but what would you tell them (if they were legal) if they brought home a 35 year old man that had plenty of money. Am talking NFL football money or more. Would it be a "be careful" type speech or "get that money baby". Could you see her getting hurt "mentally". Yvettep, I know you have young daughters. Would you let your children date men several years their senior. What would be your message to them. We know we can't chose lovers for our children but I am sure you might even talk to the man - if so,why. | ||
| Carey AALBC .com Platinum Poster Username: Carey Post Number: 2016 Registered: 05-2004 Rating: N/A |
Wow, it appears Yvettep didn't have time to wait for those questions *lol* she beat me to the board. | ||
| Yvettep AALBC .com Platinum Poster Username: Yvettep Post Number: 3580 Registered: 01-2005 Rating: N/A |
Carey, I do not necessarily think there is anything "wrong" with grown men and women being attracted to younger people who are in their late teens/early 20. I think it often says more about the older person than it does the younger person--for example some thoughts about themselves when they themselves were younger and full of hope for their future and feeling their whole lives were ahead of them. Most people, though, simply acknowledge--or, as some here have said, fantasize about--those feelings and do not act on them. Particularly when they recognize how much they have to lose that they have spent their adulthood building. Not just a marriage, but respect, financial security, stability. | ||
| Carey AALBC .com Platinum Poster Username: Carey Post Number: 2017 Registered: 05-2004 Rating: N/A |
Yvettep, I am reading what you did not say. I think the message is loud and clear. Have you thought about a career in politics :-). ***Dr. Yvettep for President*** Can I get a place on your cabinet? | ||
| Abm "Cyniquian" Level Poster Username: Abm Post Number: 10391 Registered: 04-2004 Rating: N/A |
Carey, I can disown them. Put them out of my house. Refuse to talk to them. But once they are legally grown, I can't do a dayam thing to stop'em from flukin' WHOMEVER they want to fluk. So at a certain point it don't even matter WTF I think. | ||
| Abm "Cyniquian" Level Poster Username: Abm Post Number: 10392 Registered: 04-2004 Rating: N/A |
Yvettep, I KNOW what you and others are insinuating about his being so much older than her. I personally wouldn’t want ANY parts of some 20 year old (40-something chicks are crazy enuff.). But, please. You got 20 year old chicks out there scheming like CIA agents and flukin like veteran porn stars. So spare me the But she a poor, innocent ingénue bit. When you’re legal, and willing to spread’em (for a married man for cash and prizes) all bet are off. He came to her for her youth and sex. She came to him because of his money and fame. When I was a kid we called that Even-Steven. And right now, as we read and write here 100,000's of post-pubescent American women are having sex with married men who are old enuff to be their fathers. And, guess what? Fewer than .01% of those females will KILL their lovers than kill themselves. McNair was more likely to be killed by his WIFE than he were this woman. Moreover, McNair having played pro football was more likely to kill him seeing as the average former pro football player dies in his mid FIFTIES. This incident doesn’t mean ANYTHING other than McNair ran into a crazy chick who killed him and himself. Someone as nuts as her could have just as easily did what she did were he single and she 30 years old. Hey. Sheht happens... | ||
| Carey AALBC .com Platinum Poster Username: Carey Post Number: 2019 Registered: 05-2004 Rating: N/A |
I agree with everything you've said Abm. It's obvious the issue of McNairs demise has many sides. You are right, the women probably wasn't right from the jump. Every woman that gets screwed and dumped by a superstar doesn't take his and her life. If that were so, all the leagues would probably have to close their door ...ouch. I hear your "even steven", I said that in my post. I also asked if McNair was the true victim. It's obvious he was but there are those that feel he has an equal complicity in the matter. You're kidding me, ABM. There are actually women that try to play on men? Nooooo, say it ain't so. I wonder what they bring to the table in their bags of tricks. I wonder if it's even-steven? Or is it like Las Vegas? what goes on in Las vegas, stays.....**smirk** | ||
| Carey AALBC .com Platinum Poster Username: Carey Post Number: 2022 Registered: 05-2004 Rating: N/A |
I think that says it all, Cynique. Skeezer, young and dumb or just innocent, it's seldom a match made in heaven. What gets me is something ABM said. I am around young women and many of them think they are game or worldly but there's no way I could spend time with someone that young. The common interests are just not there. For the most part, they haven't experience enough of the truths about life and I ain't ready to go through it again. | ||
| Cynique "Cyniquian" Level Poster Username: Cynique Post Number: 13882 Registered: 01-2004 Rating: N/A |
I agreed with Yvette who made no reference to the physical development or street-wise smarts of the provocative young nymphets out there in the fast lane. What Yvette instead focused on, was the EMOTIONAL immaturity of a 20 year old girl. The mental instability of these little hotties is what fuels the infantile need that casts them in the mode of a toddler reaching for candy, when they encounter an enticing older dude. The need for validation and instant gratification and the inabiliy to handle rejection are what make a 20 year old girl more vulnerable than an older, more-seasoned female. The facade of these youthful skeezers may be bold and sassy, but they are no match for the mind-games of a philandering player. (Is Carey psyhchic or did I delete my original comment so I could re-post this version which made more sense???  ) | ||
| Ntfs_encryption "Cyniquian" Level Poster Username: Ntfs_encryption Post Number: 3623 Registered: 10-2005 Rating: |
"From what I read, this "woman" was 20 years old. Most 20 year olds think they are grown, but those of us who haven't seen 20 in a minute know what a fantasy that is. In general--it is simply not wise for a grown man (or woman) to think they have an adult "arrangement" or "understanding" with someone who, likely, is so clearly not their emotional equal. As to this specific case, however, I try not to blame victims of crimes--especially so soon after their passing. So I'll reserve judgment on this tragic situation for now." I have to agree with you Ms.Yvette. Your objective and fair commentary was on the mark. I personally feel the entire incident is a tragedy. There are four children who are now fatherless. Yeah, that's what America needs -four more fatherless black children. Anyhoo, from what I have read, bro McNair was a good guy who did much for others and was very active in community and youth mentoring. And I do not make excuses for his personal behavior with this young woman. It was what it was -an older guy tipping around with a much younger woman. I must say that I cannot understand the mindset of my fellow male compadres who have a predilection for much young women. McNair was not that old (36) so the predictable old guy with the "she makes me feel young" mentality does not apply. Why would a man of 36 years old seek the company of a 20 year old (at the time of the shooting) is beyond me. But again, it was what it was.... I'm not going to judge this man because I don't feel it would be appropriate since he is now dead and he did not live a life that warranted a violent death. As I said, I think it is very tragic and tramatic for his children and his wife who was allegedly not aware of this affair. I do agree with bro ABM's statement concerning the rare occurrence of a 20 year old woman shooting a man an then turning the gun on herself. And although though she was very young and not seasoned with the convolutions and complexities of life, like her victim -she knew what she was doing! She bought that gun two days before the shooting. And from what I heard (if this is not accurate -please correct me) she was waiting for him when he returned home. All likelihood is there was a showdown, she gave him the ultimatum, he balked and the rest is history. Done deal. Ask yourself -why would a 20 year old woman who was not living in danger, in fear for her life or safety, but a gun? She more than likely had made up her mind prior to the shooting. How naive and innocent is that? Go figure....... | ||
| Chrishayden "Cyniquian" Level Poster Username: Chrishayden Post Number: 8047 Registered: 03-2004 Rating: N/A |
Steve was an asshole. Probably led the young woman on, promising to divorce his wife. Here is where the fool made his mistake--dumping her face to face. He should have made that call from out of town. Or by telegram. Oh well, another fool gone down. Feel sorry for his wife and kids. Not him. | ||
| Carey AALBC .com Platinum Poster Username: Carey Post Number: 2026 Registered: 05-2004 Rating: N/A |
Chris, how do you know he hadn't been trying to break it off days or months before that day? That's a strong statement to say the man was an asshole. I haven't see anyone other than you say that about the man. From what I've read, he was a good guy. | ||
| Abm "Cyniquian" Level Poster Username: Abm Post Number: 10393 Registered: 04-2004 Rating: N/A |
Recent news reports of double killings suggest the investigators are beginning to DOUBT that this was a murder-suicide. The lack of a motive and the preliminary analysis of the shootings, which suggest they occurred at distances and trajectories that require the shooter have a certain level of skill, is giving pause to a final closure of the investigation Simply: The po po are beginning to believe that this was a PROFESSIONAL HIT! | ||
| Carey AALBC .com Platinum Poster Username: Carey Post Number: 2028 Registered: 05-2004 Rating: N/A |
Ouch! Looks like we could have been making our move to soon. I am prone to look at this new report with a discerning eye (stink eye). Who's reporting this and have they talked about a motive behind a hit? You did say that a wife is more likely to kill their husbands than a lover. The pot is boiling, the stew thickens. | ||
| Abm "Cyniquian" Level Poster Username: Abm Post Number: 10394 Registered: 04-2004 Rating: |
Carey, I read the shots to his chest were in a location and appear to have been made at a distance that suggest someone REALLY knew what he(she) was doing. Possible alternative scenarios: 1) His jealous wife had them killed. 2) Her jealous (so-called) EX-boyfriend had them killed or did the killing himself. 3) He had some shady sheht going on somewhere that we don't yet know about and the girl was just with the wrong man, at the wrong place, at the wrong time. | ||
| Carey AALBC .com Platinum Poster Username: Carey Post Number: 2031 Registered: 05-2004 Rating: N/A |
Uuuuummm, very interesting. On the surface it appears all those scenarios are possible. Now, jusy playing black Colombo. I am having a hard time with the story that his wife didn't know something about his wandering eye. The jealous ex-boyfriend thang would be my second pick. I can't see someone killing him over some mess that involved money. You wouldn't want to bite the hands that feed you. They didn't find any signs of a struggle so Iam ruling out one of his friends being caught in the down stroke and not wearing a condom. | ||
| Cynique "Cyniquian" Level Poster Username: Cynique Post Number: 13888 Registered: 01-2004 Rating: N/A |
According to the press conference called, the official cause of deaths in this case are a homocide and suicide. Powder burns were detected on the hands of the troubled young woman found dead with McNair and she had recently purchased the gun used. | ||
| Ntfs_encryption "Cyniquian" Level Poster Username: Ntfs_encryption Post Number: 3627 Registered: 10-2005 Rating: N/A |
"According to the press conference called, the official cause of deaths in this case are a homocide and suicide. Powder burns were detected on the hands of the troubled young woman found dead with McNair and she had recently purchased the gun used." End of subject......... |
