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Pandora
Newbie Poster
Username: Pandora
Post Number: 2
Registered: 02-2005
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Friday, April 01, 2005 - 02:37 am: | 
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Hello Everybody,
Since my moms, who went under the screen name "Cynique," was a regular poster on this board I thought all of you might be interested in some sad news I have to report. Wednesday, while she was in a mall parking lot, her car was hi-jacked with her in it, and during the police chase that followed, a terrible accident occurred, leaving my moms critically injured. She is now in the ICU on life support. We are all just devastated because she is the glue that holds our family together, and the light of our lives who always shows us the way. Unfortunately, her CAT scan indicates very little brain activity, and her neurologist has already declared her to be in a vegetative state. But who knows? When I went for my 4-hour shift by her bedside tonight, I tried to talk to her. When I said the name Viggo, I swear it looked like her toes curled. Then I said the name Thumper, and it looked like she smiled. When I mentioned the name Troy, her eye lashes fluttered, when I said the name Chris Hayden, one eye opened, and then I mentioned the name ABM and her other eye opened. When I tried the name Lambd, one knee jerked. But after that, she just lie there, her stare fixed, her mouth slack. Finally, I decided to see what she'd do if I said the name Kola Boof, and when I did, she let out a long groan. I don't know what any of this means, but Cynique's grieving family hopes that you will all pray for a miracle. And, oh yeah, from his hospital bed, the driver of the hi-jacked car managed to tell us that my moms had remained calm during the entire 1-hour pursuit, and that she tried to explain to him what his purpose was in life and she even promised that if he could ditch the cops, she'd take him home and fix him a bowl of Apple Jacks. He also said how just being in her company overwhelmed him, and that she reminded him of his favorite female prison guard who, during his last incarceration, had smuggled drugs in to him. We have since learned that this fugitive was serial bank robber and there was a reward out for his capture. So once again I urge you all to pray - that my mom's Living Will will specify that with the cessation of extraordinary efforts to keep her alive, any and all monies due her will accrue to her loving spouse and cherished children. Poor moms. We'll all miss her so much, but we know this is what she would've wanted. So unless a miracle occurs by the week-end, looks like it's "game over" for the ol girl. BTW, keep your eyes out for a book I'm planning to write about this heart-rending family tragedy. I know all of you share our sorrow and now, even as I type this, I sense that the spirit of my moms is guiding my hand and before I bring this to a close, she bids me to tell you all that - wait! The phone is ringing! I'll get back to you later. In the meantime, I respectfully request that concerned parties withhold their posts until aftr I have more news to report. Thank you.
Pandora
04/01/05 |
Kola_boof
Veteran Poster
Username: Kola_boof
Post Number: 59
Registered: 02-2005
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Friday, April 01, 2005 - 09:42 am: |
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Oh, I get it.
it's April Fools Day!!
And to think I burst into tears and was ready to fly to Chicago reading the first two lines.
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Sisg
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Sisg
Post Number: 174
Registered: 01-2004
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Friday, April 01, 2005 - 10:02 am: |
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Good one Cynique!
You brought me out of retirement with this one! |
Linda
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Linda
Post Number: 115
Registered: 01-2004
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Friday, April 01, 2005 - 03:45 pm: |
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Cynique...you have out-done yourself. |
Abm
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Abm
Post Number: 2240
Registered: 04-2004
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Friday, April 01, 2005 - 03:51 pm: |
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Ditto ladies. BRAVO, Cynique!
And ENCORE! ENCORE!
H*ll. For a second, I was about to ask where should I send flowers.
HEHE! |
Crystal
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Crystal
Post Number: 204
Registered: 01-2004
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Friday, April 01, 2005 - 03:53 pm: |
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Youse a damn fool woman! |
Mahoganyanais
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Mahoganyanais
Post Number: 112
Registered: 01-2005
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Friday, April 01, 2005 - 03:55 pm: |
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She had me until the words "vegetative state." That triggered thoughts of Terri Schiavo and Cynique's I'm-going-to-burn-in-hell-for-laughing-but-it's-too-damn-funny "grinning vegetable in Florida" line, and from there the jig was up.
Good one! |
Chrishayden
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Chrishayden
Post Number: 1060
Registered: 03-2004
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Friday, April 01, 2005 - 04:42 pm: |
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Pandora:
Poor Cynique. I'm so sorry. My condolences to you and the rest of the family. I feel responsible. I really regret calling her that name on this site. What was it again? hmmmmmmm...can somebody help me? |
Scullars
Veteran Poster
Username: Scullars
Post Number: 62
Registered: 02-2004
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Friday, April 01, 2005 - 09:07 pm: |
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ROTFLMAO  |
Thumper
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Thumper
Post Number: 389
Registered: 01-2004
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Friday, April 01, 2005 - 10:58 pm: |
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Hello All,
Cynique: That was a good one. *LOL* The long groan line gave you away. If you had said, when I told her _____ she came up swinging, I would have caught the first flight to Chicago myself. |
Kola_boof
Veteran Poster
Username: Kola_boof
Post Number: 60
Registered: 02-2005
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Friday, April 01, 2005 - 11:08 pm: |
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Oh great.
So they could BOTH got their sorry asses whooped.
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Mivharmeni
Newbie Poster
Username: Mivharmeni
Post Number: 3
Registered: 03-2005
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Saturday, April 02, 2005 - 11:13 pm: |
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A hot mess! LOL! |
Libralind2
Newbie Poster
Username: Libralind2
Post Number: 21
Registered: 09-2004
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Saturday, April 02, 2005 - 11:38 pm: |
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Ummm Cynique, this was a cruel joke to play on someone who is new to the AALBC board. I read the first part with my hand over my mouth and was horrified until you started writing about screen names. I was then very very suspicious. By the end of the piece, I probably looked like Thumper with eyebrow raised and then as I read the various comments especially Kola's about whooping azz..I was cracking up. Halloween is probably a REAL trip over here....
Linda From Ohio |
Cynique
"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Username: Cynique
Post Number: 2054
Registered: 01-2004
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Sunday, April 03, 2005 - 02:56 pm: |
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Hello Everybody!
Thanks for all of your "sympathetic" feed-back. I was touched, and I'm sure your messages had something to do with my miraculous recovery; that and the fact that when my son whispered in my ear how Illinois had beaten Louisville in the Final 4,life just coursed back through my veins! I was totally revitalized by the news that the university I attended had emerged victorious and I was especially enlivened because one of its team's major stars, Dee Brown, is a hometown boy who graduated from the same high school as I did. Go, Illini!
Now, excuse me while I go sharpen my shiv. heh-heh. |
Literarylicense
Newbie Poster
Username: Literarylicense
Post Number: 16
Registered: 02-2005
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Sunday, April 03, 2005 - 07:04 pm: |
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lol...i hope all this creativity roll off on me. :-) |
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