"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Post Number: 566
|Posted on Thursday, July 29, 2004 - 12:45 pm: |
You make some very eloquent points about how men and women can build healthy, productive families and communities. How do you reconcile your seemly traditional views with the (often quite 'strident') elements within our current socio-political environment that would have us all believe that men and women are, absent differences in gonads, essentially the same and should be viewed/treated as thusly?
I am happy for you that you are able to eschew much of the more "unproductive" elements of the American zeitgeist. Though I wonder how removed from the popular culture one can be before she materially limit her ability to enjoy some truly worthy and mutually beneficial opportunities. For example, there is A LOT of CRAP on the Internet. People are hocking lies, propaganda, porn, breast/penile enhancement devices, credit card schemes, phony business opportunities, etc. So one might conclude it is better to avoid using the web altogether. But of course, by doing that, one would also deny oneself a myriad opportunities to learn, read, communicate and meet with a near infinite assortment of people, places, things and concepts.
So perhaps it is not whether one enjoys playing "Grand Theft Auto", dancing to hip-hop music or perusing the latest Hollywood scuttlebutt that is the issue but rather whether one can partake of such activities in a self-controlled and moderate manner.
Interesting. Your views above would appear to differ from what you have (often ardently) asserted in months prior. In the past, you argued that males and females behavior is primarily the product of socialization. But here you appear to suggest there are indeed more natural differences between Adam and Eve.
Is your perspective on sexual/gender issues evolving a bit? Or have I misinterpreted your prior/current positions? I am, of course, sure it is the latter.
You are right. White women are as besotted by all the beauty imagery and demands as Black women. Still, this issue is more acutely problematic for Black women because the threshold of achieving certain elements of the 'Westernize' beauty criteria are often much lower for them than they are for Black women.
Simply put: It is easier for an anorexic White girl than it is for a shapely young Black girl to look like Julia Roberts .
That is perhaps why Black women spend an alleged 4X (per a recent Revlon study) the amount of money of beauty-related products than do White women. So while it is true that all women are struggle with the concept of beauty, the sistahs are made to spend more time/money pursuing something that they have the least hopes of obtaining.
Certainly what you exclaim may to minor degree be part of the problem. But this ubiquitous notion of hordes of Black men preferring to lust after, date and marry White women is often based less on comprehensive fact and more on biased anecdote. I agree wholeheartedly with Moonsigns here. Because while I concede some of what you cite may be more of a authentic phenomenon in the Military, on the West Coast and certain other more 'liberal' sectors of the country; all other statistics assert that brothers typically chose to mate with sisters (even those brothers who are 'on the down low'...hehe!).
Moreover, this fixation among Black women to achieve some variant of Caucasian beauty begins long before they begin to concern themselves with what males think about them. For example, I am sure you've read about studies have asserted that lil' Black girls often prefer White/Light complexion dolls to darker ones. Young Black boys are not causing Black girls to feel that way. Our young sisters and daughters are so bombarded by the glorification of White skin, straight, blond hair, blue eyes, etc, I personally feel compelled to constantly remind my young daughters that they are in their own way as pretty as the (very White) Hillary Duffs of the worlds.
The issue of beauty is really just a microcosm or a symptom of the much larger and graver issue of our having for centuries been incapable of charting our own course as a people. And to further the point that Moonsigns appear to make concerning Black entrepreneurship and economic independence (in her last post), I would argue that until Black people can effectively feed, clothe, shelter, transport, educate, protect, entertain and love each other in a manner that is at least moderately independent of others, we will ALWAYS be subject to the standards/criteria imposed by others irrespective of how ardently we try to ignore/avoid such. And that includes for us what is (and isn't)...'beautiful'.