"Cyniquian" Level Poster
Post Number: 3801
|Posted on Friday, January 08, 2010 - 06:42 pm: |
”NTFS: Right off the bat, we have to take into consideration how black women outnumber black men almost 2 to 1. That alone puts them at a disadvantage. Black men can pick and choose, and even if all black women undergo "make-overs" there will still be thousands of them left behind.”
I’ve heard this 2:1 myth many times before. It’s not true. Actually, the percentage of black female/male is 54%/46%. No where near the imagined overwhelming percentage of female to male that we hear about. I constantly hear this exaggerated gender ratio and I have no idea where it comes from.
” Setting their sites on men of other races doesn't offer black women great prospects, either, because there's no reason to be believe that great numbers of white men will choose black women over white women.”
True. But don’t forget, there are other men who would probably consider dating black women if certain criteria (criteria that black women control) is met. Especially Latino men. Since they like thick women also, black women (as a group) could meet this interest. As you have suggested, it would not fill the gap or produce an unlimited pool of men for black women, but it would certainly give some black women opportunities for relationships.
”Actually, rather than rejecting them, I think black women would be flattered if eligible white bachelors started paying serious attention to them. But that ain't gonna happen.“
True again. But as I have said, black women (as a group) are not as open to relationships with white (or non-black) males as say black males are to white (or non-black) females. For example; When I go to the NEX or Commissary, the majority of black men I see with wives and children, are with non-black women. I must also point out that this is a specific demographic (military in a specific geographic location) and does not represent black males as a group at large. But I have a black female friend (ex-military) who has stridently maintained that black men in San Diego are dating at a 90% non-black female percentage. I argued with her for years about this, so she has now backed down to 80%! Yes, she maintains 80% of black men in San Diego date outside the race. Now, of course this is ridiculous but it is a perception she seriously believes. And I can understand why she believes this because to the casual observer, you might tend to believe something like that. But it’s not true.
Another story. One day I was talking to my cousin who was living in Peoria at the time. She told me she was driving her car and almost ran a stop sign because she saw a black man walking and holding hands with a black woman. My response (like yours) was, "Duhhhhhh??? Why??” What is so hard about seeing a black man and a black woman? Her response (verbatim): “ Well, it because it’s rare to see a black man with a black woman because most of the brothers here don’t date black women.” Those were her exact words -not mine. Now, I have no idea how accurate that is but I suspect that it is not entirely true. But that certainly was her perception.
One more thing. When I go back to Ohio, I often times see older white women with very young children that are obviously of mixed racial heritage. These are their grandchildren and you frequently see them at the mall, Wal-Mart, shopping plaza’s, etc. So, there is a black daddy somewhere in the picture. But back in the day, when I was very young, you did not see things like that….PERIOD! But now, it is not uncommon. And I see young black guys at the university where I went to school with white girls all the time. When I went to that school (which was 93% white), you never, ever saw a black guy walking around with a white girl!!! Today, well, it’s a different time and that particular racial protocol does not apply. But no where have I seen the numbers of black females with non-black males as I see with black males with non-black females. Why? Because of the reason you stated and the unwillingness of black females (as a group) to date males that are non-black.